Description: A man blocks Metro door while contemplating life. Other passengers plot his downfall.
Everyday, thousands of Delhiites embark on a high-stakes psychological thriller that is not found on Netflix but on the Blue Line of the Delhi Metro. The villain? Not pollution, nor potholes, but the humble passenger who plants himself at the door with all the conviction of someone defending his ancestral plot in Bihar.
“Please move inside,” groans the Metro’s robotic lady every 12 seconds, a voice as ignored as your eighth-grade science teacher. Yet, there they stand — the ‘Gatekeepers of Connaught Place’, armed with backpacks, indifference, and the occasional samosa packet. Their logic? If you stand at the door, you’re automatically one step ahead of the game — who cares if fifty-six others behind you are trying to squeeze in like poorly packed paneer rolls?
It’s not just selfishness; it’s performance art. There’s the “Innocent Statue” type: eyes glazed over, pretending to not hear pleading voices behind them. Then the “Reverse Psychology Guru” who insists they’ll get down “next station”, which somehow is always two stations too late. And let’s not forget the “Backpack Breakdown Zone” — a sacred realm where bags become sentient creatures that occupy more space than an Ambani bungalow drawing room.
But perhaps we’re being too harsh. Maybe they’re not simply ignoring everyone’s pain. Maybe they’ve taken “holding space” too literally. Or perhaps this is Delhi’s silent way of teaching us patience, inner peace, and the precise anatomical flexibility required to stand with your chin in someone’s armpit.
Still, a little kindness wouldn’t hurt. Scooch in a bit, dear Metro Warrior. Make room for ambition, dreams, and knees that need bending space. The real test of character isn’t in holding the door — it’s in letting others breathe.
Maybe the solution lies in incentivizing movement. Free Wi-Fi in the centre of the coach? A surprise dance performance there every Friday? Or a secret button that opens a trapdoor beneath you if you refuse to budge?
Until then, dear citizens of the underground battleground, remember: shoving builds biceps, but sliding in builds society.
#DelhiMetroDiaries #MoveInBhai #PublicTransportChronicles #PeakHoursPeakDrama #MetroMatlabMaze
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