Dhurandhar 2 Box Office Collection on Day 13: Movie Theatres Hand Out Emergency Therapy Vouchers

Mumbai — The hysteria that Dhurandhar 2 has sparked among the moviegoers has initiated a nationwide panic. With the outrageous collection on day 13, theatres have begun issuing emergency therapy vouchers to stressed box office staff.

All Money, No Sleep for Box Office Workers

In an unprecedented turn of events post the release of Dhurandhar 2, box office workers have been diagnosed with terrifecountitus, an affliction caused by incessantly counting heaps of cash in very little time. A representative from the BOWPS (Box Office Workers’ Preservation Society) stated that this condition is highly contagious and can lead to acute finger cramps and vision impairment due to excessive exposure to currency ink.

Ambulances Replaced with Armoured Vans

In a desperate bid to manage the unprecedented influx of cash sans chaos, an emergency measure has been issued. Ambulances around cinema halls have been replaced with armoured vans meant to safely transport collected cash, aiming to prevent the sudden outbreak of spontaneous wealthy syndrome among unsuspecting pedestrians. Meanwhile, the transportation cost of these vans has been duly added to the day 13 collection of Dhurandhar 2, blowing its earning figures out of proportion.

Casual Singh, Unaffected Citizen Shares His Thoughts

Casual Singh, a freelance software developer who works from movie theatres due to lack of a stable Wi-Fi connection, quoted, “It’s madness, I tell you. I used to come here for the free Wi-Fi, but now I come just to witness the chaos. There’s the lady at the popcorn counter using leftover popcorn as packing material for cash bundles, it’s like a Madhubani painting in motion.” His overexcited proclamation somehow eased the tension, reminding everyone that it’s not monetary success but the ensuing madness that ensures a movie’s legacy.

Disclaimer: This is a work of satire for entertainment purposes.

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