Thumbnail Description: Cartoon astronaut hanging clothes to dry on the Moon.
In a moment equal parts epic and mildly confusing, India’s space agency ISRO just announced its plans to launch the country’s very own space station by 2035. Yes, that’s right—one small step for astronauts, one giant leap for peaceful punjabi uncles to say, “Beta, hum bhi NASA ke barabar hain ab!” All this while my landlord still won’t fix the geyser in February.
Anyway, the planned station is expected to orbit about 400 kilometers above the Earth, presumably far from all Delhi traffic, smog, and DJ nights someone forgot to get a license for. It’s a move that not only cements India’s place in the Major League of Cosmic Coolness but also implies that we now intend to sweep the galactic floor with a jhaadu made of jugaad and lunar ambition.
Now, obviously, as a humble civilian whose scientific credentials include figuring out if Maggi is done by taste rather than timing, I feel slightly underprepared to critique an orbital installation. But I do have questions. For starters, will the Indian Space Station have a pantry with actual pani puri? Will the astronauts take a power nap at 2 pm sharp under the sacred Office Fan? One can only hope the space station also comes with a WhatsApp group where someone’s mom is constantly sharing motivational DPs.
The station will reportedly support astronauts for up to 20 days at a time—coincidentally, about as long as most of us last in a gym before ghosting our trainer. But where’s the fun if Earth’s habits don’t follow us to orbit? Will they install a Pureit filter next to the oxygen generator? Maybe a “No Chappal Beyond This Point” sign next to the airlock? I’m not saying it’s necessary, just… culturally cohesive.
There’s a beautiful irony here: Delhi Metro still can’t run during heavy fog, cows are still attending citizens’ meetings on Ring Road, yet we’re going to space. And you know what? I’m not even mad. I adore the contradiction. Ours is a country where the same nation that builds satellite launch systems with mathematical precision also believes in bird poop as a sign of good luck. It’s delightful. Why shouldn’t we be the ones to democratize space travel using ethics, emojis, and a whole lotta ghee?
Additionally, let’s take a moment to appreciate how these astronauts will be trained. An ISRO official stated the training will include zero-gravity simulators, which are just fancy versions of trying to get to the second rack of a DTC bus during peak hours—but slower and more polite. Plus, eating floating dal chawal really just prepares them for every student’s hostel nightmare.
The best part? It’s peaceful. Unlike certain other countries that label every rocket launch as ‘defense-related,’ we’re sending scientists into space with a friendly wave and a thermos of masala chai. It’s science for the joy of science—the rarest variety, much like a functioning Delhi parking meter.
As we look forward to the Indian Space Station twinkling above us in a constellation somewhere between Scorpius and Rising Onion Prices, it’s clear that we’re reaching for the stars while still firmly grounded in our glorious chaos below. And maybe that’s okay.
After all, only a country confident enough to put a budget satellite on Mars using the money most Hollywood movies burn on making Iron Man look shiny can genuinely claim, “We got this.”
So here’s to the scientists, the dreamers, and that one astronaut who’ll surely smuggle pickles in their space suit. Because no matter where we go—upward, sideways, intergalactically—India isn’t just participating in the space race. It’s doing it in chappals.
#ISRO2024 #IndianSpaceStation #ChaiInSpace #OrbitAndOutrage #DesiAstronautVibes
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