Mumbai — BSE’s bull turned into an overzealous stock-trader, sprinting towards unprecedented profits of ₹795 crore – an abrupt surge of 61%. The raging bull has not only crushed the COVID-induced bear of economic downturn but also gave birth to generous dividends of ₹10 per share. Enough to make that thali a little more tastier.
Bull Stampede Sends Prices to the Moon
While the everyday trader was found fuming over their chai about the market unpredictability, the good old bull of BSE took no breaks during the fourth quarter. Converting green pastures into green portfolios, the bull was not just free but on a profitable spree. Hitting a high so monumental, even the moon was within reach.
RBI Dissatisfied with Bull’s Non-compliance to Diet
The Reserve Bank couldn’t hide its intimidation. “The bull should have shown some self-restraint. Where’s the balance in eating all the profits? Of course, no one’s complaining, but this chap is clearly not adhering to his diet,” stated a disturbed RBI officer. The diet, however, remained unchanged – ‘profit by any means necessary’.
Local Tea Vendor Plans IPO Launch
Encouraged by the bullish turn of events, Ramesh Shinde, the local tea vendor, plans his IPO launch. “Why sell just tea when I can sell my brand on the stock exchange, hai na?” Shinde asserted, stirring his signature masala chai with newfound vigor. “Look at that bull go, that’s good for business, mine especially. Thank God, my chai doesn’t just run on steam!”
Disclaimer: This is a work of satire for entertainment purposes.
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