Mumbai — In an unexpected turn of cinematic events, veteran actor Lalit Parimoo has announced a revolutionary plan to coach newbie cinema-stars Ananya Panday and Janhvi Kapoor.
“Learning ABC’s of Acting, the Parimoo way”
Riding the wave of his recent trending comment, urging young stars to ‘first learn acting’, Parimoo has launched an “Acting 101” course—bootcamp-style. From the basics of emotion-expression to crafting an authentic fake cough, he promises to cover it all. Backed by 3 decades of Bollywood experience, the legendary actor is set to mould these sparkling gems into blossoming actors, or so he claims.
While some in Bollywood call this an unconventional approach, others opine that the direct method will impart much-needed lessons in acting. Muttered one unnamed producer, “Our budgets will thank us. No more wasted takes. No more unconvincing crying scenes.”
“And…Action! The Blitz Course Commences.”
The course – delivered in Parimoo’s backyard, amidst chirping crickets, cawing crows, and the occasional confused pigeon, has already seen these nascent stars struggle to understand the basic nuances of human emotion. The lesson on sarcastic eyerolls lasted an entire day with neither actor grasping the fine line between sneering and boredom. Parimoo remained patient, stating, “It’s all about the eyebrows.”
“Get Me an Oscar…” – Spontaneous Audience Demands.”
A local avid movie-buff, Mr. Sharma was spotted frantically waving a broom at a shopkeeper whilst shouting, “Limited edition Lalit Parimoo acting course DVDs! Stock them up! Order them now!”. Meanwhile, a flustered tea vendor shared, “The chai discussion table underwent pandemonium. Folks went from arguing over cricket to debating which Bollywood newbie most needs Lalit Sir’s acting lessons. It has been a chaos.”
Disclaimer: This is a work of satire for entertainment purposes.
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