Panjim, Goa — A nail-biting saga of curiosity and frustration unfolded as the nation tangled in an existential crisis: are banks open or closed?
Bank Holiday Special: Nation Plays Schrödinger’s Bank
With the sudden announcement of a state-wise bank holiday due to Bakri Eid, the banks jumped into the intriguing role of Schrödinger’s Cat. Simultaneously, they carried the state of being both ‘open’ and ‘closed’ until someone chose to check. Avid cricket lovers, used to the uncertainties served by Duckworth Lewis and recently introduced DRS, seemed delighted to have another puzzle at hand.
People vs Pigeons: A Critical Account of Survival
As bank-goers stared longingly at shutted banks, they found unexpected competition. Confused pigeons, it turned out, too had their faith in the banking schedule. They had been planning a monumental deposit of their ‘white gold’ on the bank exteriors, their way of celebrating the ‘Banky Eid’. The turbulence created by humans swinging shutters disrupted the noble pigeon procession, leading to a showdown. The avian assault resulted in the urgent deployment of ten new umbrella sellers opening business within twenty feet of the bank.
Renowned Diviner Recalls the Prophecy of the Blue Bottle
“I had seen the signs,” confessed renowned psychic and bottle cap-aficionado, Glassy Sardar of Panjim. “The ripple pattern in my Kingfisher beer spoke volumes. Also, a blue bottle of Pedigree had appeared mysteriously on my chair. It was clear as crystal – banks were to shutter. Unfortunately, people took me for a drunkard rather than the alcoholic oracle I truly am,” concluded the teary-eyed seer.
Disclaimer: This is a work of satire for entertainment purposes.
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