Kolkata — In an unprecedented turn of events, Kolkatans are joyously demolishing their walls, literally, not metaphorically, in anticipation of exiled author Taslima Nasreen’s return after 19 long years.
No Walls For Taslima
With Taslima’s return, Kolkatans are sending a symbolic message by tearing down their walls, leading to an unexpected construction boom. Cement companies, bewildered by this unusual demand, are producing “Taslima’s Return” branded bags of cement for the wall-destroying Kolkatans. “How do we profit from people building something by destroying it? We still can’t figure, but business is business, and we are selling!”, said a perplexed Prem Kumar, CEO of ‘Fast & Hard Cement’.
Demolition Men, Heroes of The Hour
The heroes emerging amidst the rubble aren’t the ones with capes, but rather construction helmets. The demolition workers are hailed as Kolkata’s equivalent of the Avenger’s, and are being excessively tipped for the reverse construction. With the city’s buildings looking somewhat like a deconstructivist architectural piece, the government has rolled up its sleeves to support the cause. A statewide competitive demolition derby is now in the making.
Every Kolkatan Speaks Out…With A Sledgehammer
Tapping into the buzz, we managed to interview Bhola Da, a local paan vendor turned demolition expert. Brandishing a hammer as he spoke, he told us with glistening eyes, “We are prepared to live in tents, but we won’t erect boundaries against our Taslima Di(daughter). My paan shop has turned into an open area stall, but business is still as spicy as my famous betel leaf mix”.
Disclaimer: This is a work of satire for entertainment purposes.
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